My wife is very happy in memory care. I visit her every day. It's just an eight minute drive away. Our two adult children, one daughter-in-law, and four grandchildren want to travel from out-of-state to visit. I've only taken my wife out a hand full of times to the park, the grocery store, or to the pharmacy. I don't anymore because it seems to unsettle her, make her cry, or make her anxious. I don't want all eight of us trying to visit her at her memory care at the same time. I'm sure that would be too much, even for me. Should we visit her at her memory care in small groups for short periods over several days? Or should we try and meet at a park for a picnic where the children could play? Would the presence of the children keep her from being anxious? She loves to watch them play. I think it would be good medicine for her to see them but I need some ideas on how to go about it. She's so well adjusted, I don't want to rock the boat.
The idea of multiple small group visits is a good one.
Is there a time of day that works better than others for her so you can schedule her when she's likely to be at her best? I would imagine that evening/sundown is not a good time for many.
Is there a group activity room that you could use where she is staying? Maybe something with three or four tables for two to four people to be at each while waiting for their turn to visit at her table? Maybe take the kids to the park to burn off some energy before the visit and have an activity for them to work at at their table? Have it all set up so she can be the last to arrive while everyone else is in their places. If she is used to group activities in the room, she might be less stressed about the differing members of the group. And there wouldn't be any commotion about getting in and out of the car to get there.
Ask the staff if they have any suggestions.
I agree with Frebrowser that meeting in small groups may be a good tactic and to ask the staff for suggestions. I also think that if the facility is having any events or activities that day, all could participate with her at that, especially if the visit is in the afternoon. Or, maybe you can have a simple "fun" activity with her, like balloon volleyball, a simple craft, a visit with a pet, etc. something you know she's done before and likes. I hope it is a wonderful visit for all!