Follow
Share

My husband has cognitive impairment and balance issues. I cannot care for him at home anymore as I have to undergo surgery (total hip replacement). He is going into a really nice assisted living facility next week. He has agreed to do this to give me a chance to rebuild my strength. I worry about making the transition. Any suggestions!

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
You doing all the right stuff for you and you husband and have gotten some great advice from Sunny and Geewhiz. Best of luck to you.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Thank you for your wonderful suggestions. I am a little apprehensive.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

It's nice he has agreed to go there in order to help since you are having surgery. That shows he's thinking pretty clearly, but if he has cognitive problems, that could change, depending on how he feels when it comes time for the move. If the problem is dementia, he could forget what he agreed to do.

Depending on how much he understands, I would keep it as a positive experience and not dwell on it too much. I might keep it low key by transporting him over in a quiet way and get him settled in. Anyway to get his things in his room so that they are ready when he walks in as Geewiz said? The only problem is that some Assisted Living facilities want to meet them in person, before they sign everything and assign the room.

Most recommend that you not visit for awhile, but when it's a spouse, I'm not sure that's a given. Depending on how much he understand, I would play that by ear and do what I felt was right. Keeping in mind that it's not uncommon for residents to cry and beg to return home.

I will also ADD that something I found that made my loved one feel better is that I made a big deal out of what the other residents and staff said about my loved one. It wasn't necessarily true, but I told my loved one that the residents really liked her and that they were VERY excited to have her on their wing. I told her that the staff thought she was the nicest and most friendly resident they had ever had and that they were tickled to have her in their facility. I always tried to ensure that other people there liked her and valued her. It made her feel more comfortable there.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Get some helpers and have his room at AL all set when you bring him there. It should include familiar items that will make him feel like home. Photos, his clothes, personal care items, shoes slippers perhaps one or two of your family photo albums, etc. Personally, I would plan to bring him before lunch and then eat lunch with him. Take him on a tour of the facility. Make sure he meets the aides and a few of the other residents. Join in an activity with him and then be gone before the next meal - but while he is participating in something else. I know that many others disagree with this point, but I was sure to visit my Mom the next morning so she didn't feel abandoned. Ask friends/family to stop by and say hello to him. Good luck with the move and your surgery.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter