Gershun Posted November 2016
General topics.
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Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
how fast can you get your privacy screen up ? Or how about a fence so they can’t encroach on your side ?
You could do a vertical garden that hangs on planters on your side of the fence , to pretty it up .
My cousin owns a company that installs these vertical gardens on building walls in NYC
Your neighbors don’t seem to be very neighborly or wise. They remove your nice established shrubs, only to end up planting trees, that they also removed! 😝
So, how did they justify planting trees that would have grown onto your property? 🙄 That’s pretty ridiculous!
The ass planted a whole bunch of little spruce trees where the hedge had been and I was wondering how I was going to deal with them inevitably encroaching on my yard, but fortunately they've all been removed now. I think part of the issue may be that he has retired and is looking for projects🙄
I love trees too. They can cause quite a stir amongst neighbors though.
Some people get upset about how messy they are. It’s nature! We can’t control which direction the wind blows the leaves in.
My godmother would get furious about the leaves from her neighbor’s tree ending up in her yard. She could be vengeful at times. She would rake the leaves and dump them back onto their yard!
I asked her why didn’t she just dump the leaves in the trash? She said because the leaves were from their tree! My godmother had a mean streak in her.
I think you are being very sensible about your neighbours.
I have a mountain ash that is bushy and grows over the neighbours' (older couple) driveway. We keep it trimmed and I told them to lop off what ever they wanted to on their side. She told me she loves that tree. On the other side they had a huge spruce that very much added to our privacy and they cut it down. The neighbours to the back had a wonderful stand of birch in their front garden and they cut it down. Another neighbour across from them cut down a lovely maytree and replaced it with garden ornaments. The new owners of that house are now growing another tree, I am pleased to see.. Another cut out a mock orange shrub that flowered beautifully. One neighbour on the other side had a lovely apple tree - they removed it a couple of years ago and replaced it with something much less attractive. If I had known I would have offered to have it removed to our garden. The blossom was beautiful and the fruit very good, if small. I have walked a lot in my neighbourhood and enjoyed all the trees, shrubs and gardens in general and miss them when they are cut down. I don't understand chopping down good trees and shrubs. They add so much to the area.
I find it interesting how many people end up in court over trees. Sometimes, people have legitimate concerns. Other times it is trivial.
People are sue happy these days and will sue over just about everything.
My neighbor planted an oak tree right next to our driveway. I didn’t see her planting it. I saw it after the fact.
Needless to say, I wasn’t happy about it because the roots are eventually going to cause structural damage and crack our driveway.
Am I taking her to court? No, I am not, but I did speak to her civilly about the situation. She said, that she loves trees and wanted a tree in that area of her yard.
At that point, I decided to walk away, because I didn’t feel like she was logical enough to have an intelligent conversation with. I didn’t feel like wasting my time.
The neighbor on the other side of me, tried to sue us, saying that a limb from our tree broke his bathroom window during a hurricane.
Our tree doesn’t encroach on his property at all. Our insurance agent said that he would never win the case and he didn’t.
Our fence was destroyed from strong hurricane winds and the neighbors tree behind us fell on it as well. We didn’t try to sue him. We simply repaired our fence.
The newer neighbours built a shed in the front which was against bylaws and did my property no good, so I contacted the city and the neighbours removed it to the back of their property. She somehow got ahold of me on face book and tried to bargain. I didn't respond. I explained to him, as he as erecting it, as did the bylaw officer, it was against bylaws so it had to be moved. What I thought of it was immaterial. I maintained a nodding acquaintance with her. Rarely saw him. Once he and a friend were on bicycles on the side walk when I was out for a walk. As I approached they didn't move so I had to walk out on the road to get around them. Not very neighbourly.
I am sorry you lost the cedar hedge. Is it worth planting one on your property?
I suppose technically that they had the right to remove it. It would have been nice of them to tell you that they were going to remove it, instead of just cutting it down without your knowledge.
My nice older neighbours on the other side are gone now, I have been planting things along that side of my yard in anticipation of that day but nothing is nearly big enough yet.
Why did they remove the hedge? Did they ask first or just remove it without discussing it with you first? Was it on their property line?
That’s weird that they would remove it.
Way,
Some people are just plain crazy! 😜
My son came in the house to tell me that . I went outside and the woman and her son were still in my yard. I told her my son has one mother telling him what to do and that’s enough and to take her son and go home .
I had a neighbor ask me to borrow my new carpet cleaner machine soon after I had put the box to my new machine in the trash 😂😂. She asked to borrow it because her incontinent aunt that lived with her was having accidents as well as her elderly dog !!!
I lied and told her it’s not my machine . 😬😬. At the time my parents would come and put larger trash items out in front of my house because their trash company was stricter about that .
Yep! Fences and shrubs make good neighbors.
My husband and I rented a townhouse when we first got married.
I had a neighbor who was constantly borrowing things. Generally, I didn’t mind once in a while, but she started running things into the ground, and I had to put a stop to it.
The straw that broke the camel’s back was when she said that her vacuum cleaner broke and she wanted to borrow ours. She had two kids. Kids spill things and I really didn’t mind loaning her our vacuum.
I did mind when she knocked on my door the next day saying that she lost her favorite earrings and asked me to look inside the vacuum cleaner bag for them!
I told her that I was highly allergic to dust and that she was more than welcome to look herself for the earrings. I handed her the vacuum cleaner bag and told her to have at it and good luck with finding her earrings.
My mom said that she had a neighbor who would borrow eggs, a minute later she went back for flour, then sugar, etc. Mom said that she asked the woman if she wanted her to go over to her house and bake the cake too! LOL 😝
I lived in a small town previous to this but the yards were bigger and the houses father apart so it was a lot simpler. Here there is very little separation between us so I was horrified when the hedge came down, sometimes we can be gardening within feet of each other. (I'm the newbie here, I considered the hedge one of the positive selling features)
Our new neighbors are a young couple with a 1st grade son. Blake is Mr. Action Jackson (he literally has ADHD) but is always chipper and willing to help. If we make eye contact, we wave. If he has something to say to us, we meet up and chat. We text-gripe about the deer, squirrels, creeping charlie, etc. He'll mow our front law on his riding mower, he'll snowblow our driveway without even asking (and my hubs doesn't readily ask for help). And he's happy to do it to burn his excess energy so I don't feel obligated to him, just thankful and blessed. I'd much prefer a lively friendly neighbor than a grump or a bore whose main concern is defending their property lines, our "Mr. Wilson's" main activity.
If they aren’t new neighbors don’t feel like you have to act different just because the hedge is gone.
Privacy screen is a good idea . In the meantime I would probably do a wave hello while wearing headphones or a Bluetooth or phone up to my ear when I first went outside if I didn’t want to chat. Then you could sit down on your deck with your back to them . No one is required to speak. You will feel more comfortable once you get your screen up . But you don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to . It’s your yard , if you want privacy and not chit chat that’s fine .
My DH puts headphones on in airplane if he’s not in the mood to talk , even if he’s not listening to anything from the headphones .
I have neighbors pretty close on one side , because of the hilly terrain , even though we have large yards , the homes , decks are fairly close . We are perfect neighbors to one another . Friendly but not in each other’s business. Sometimes we chit chat sometimes we don’t .Nobody gets offended . We go out to dinner a couple of times a year .
And we both know we could call the other in an emergency .
Yes cwillie, just be you!!
Personally, I think everyone’s perception of ”normal” is different for every individual.
Do whatever you want to do. If you don’t want to greet them or acknowledge them, then you shouldn’t.
Keeping to yourself, doesn’t make you unfriendly. It means that you prefer to enjoy your privacy. Solitude isn’t abnormal.
You have valid reasons for feeling as you do.
There are people who I avoid in my neighborhood and people who I love to speak to.
I respect others’ privacy and I expect them to value mine as well.
We have a busybody who rides around on her bicycle snooping for information on others. No one talks to this woman in my neighborhood.
Most people say that this woman reminds them of the ‘Wicked Witch of the West’ from the ‘Wizard of Oz,’ who rode around on her bicycle. Hee, hee.
One time, she asked me who was paying my neighbor’s bills because she knew that he had been laid off at work.
I gave her a look like, ‘Why would you even ask me that question?”
Then, I said to her, ‘If you want to know anything about their life, go knock on their door and ask them, because I am not going to tell you someone else’s personal business.’
She never stopped to ask me her nosey questions ever again! 😝 I don’t speak to her and she doesn’t speak to me anymore.
If I wave and get a wave back then Id probably say hi, and give a quick chat.
If a new neighbor moves in now, at this point in my life, I keep a friendly distance, until I get to know them.
Personally I love to be friendly but as for neighbors I personally think it's better to not be to friendly, we have had neighbors that ask us a favor then , it turns into another and another, then I pull the plug on the neighbor and there annoyed. It's hard living right next door to some you don't get along with.
We had this one sweet older guy across the street, he was having car issues. Every so often he would leave his hood up and I would tell my husband and he would go over and look at his car. It was just a nice neighborhood thing.
My neighbor right next door had really bad lung issues, I was always watching if he let the dogs out for to long I would send my husband over to check on him.
We actually have a very nice neighborhood for the most part of people just being there , but not being to close. It's perfect, but the are redoing a house beside us to rent so that will be interesting.
But no I don't wave and be friendly Everytime I walk out the door. That could be a lot of waving all day. Lol
I saw a story on television where people are putting pickles in Dr. Pepper!
Yuck! It may be a new thing but I won’t be trying this trend.
They are comparing it to chicken and waffles, pineapples on pizza and mint and lamb, saying that opposites attract.
I totally agree that you shouldn’t even consider option four.
I say to do whatever you feel like doing. You don’t have to speak with them if you don’t want to.
I have no qualms with not speaking to people that I am not interested in talking with.
I wouldn’t do anything that I wasn’t comfortable with.
Even if you do choose to speak to them, it can be a simple ‘hello’ and nothing more.
When I get time I want a watch last night CNN special. I think I can get it on hulu
Type that into search engine and the article comes up. Thanks AnxietyN.
It was about how difficult it is as a caregiver and how you get burnout a lot quicker and how to deal with it